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PostPosted: Sat Dec 31, 2016 7:27 pm 
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SuperMoto Dude
SuperMoto Dude

Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 10:10 am
Posts: 399
Location: Port Clinton, OH
I am fifty-five years old. I am declared 100% disabled for reasons of mental health. Further, I've been shown the MRI's of my back and pointed out the osteoarthritis in both my right and left facet joints from my L6 to L1. My MIR also showed compression bulging between my L6/L5 and my L4/L3 with disc degeneration between my L5 and L4. I haven't mention to any one the blow out of two right side facet joints in my neck. Nor, have I made mention of the osteoarthritiic pain in my left thumb. To diagnosis the possibility of neurological damage for my essential tremors, it was discovered that 30 some years ago I'd suffered micro-strokes. In the end, my essential tremors was attributed to the side effects of my medications

be whatever may be, I live at a pain level of 4 to 5 on a daily basis.

I live with my father who is 80 years old. His right hip has been replaced twice. It is only a matter of time before we discuss left knee replacement as well as left hip replacement. I suggested a two for deal. Also, Dad has had 2 back surgeries to rebuild his lumbar spine.

I've taken him to the ER as often as he has taken me to the ER. We live in this relationship of you look out for me and I look out for you.

The other thing to consider, I live up stairs In the converted apartment and he lives down stairs in the main house.

I plan my adventures in lollipops of three days and two nights, so I'm not that absent for very long.

Given that the threads concerning the demographics of age group, I know I'm not alone in this situation. How do you deal with caring for your parent(s) ans still ride to your desire?


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 12:34 am 
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Adventure Rider
Adventure Rider

Joined: Wed Oct 27, 2010 9:22 pm
Posts: 1598
Location: San Diego County, CA, USA
It's great you're there for each other.

Re riding, I love it and if it was the only thing keeping me sane, I'd make it a priority. I'd walk away from it if it came 'tween me and a family member needing assistance.

Best of luck and health! Hang it there.

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Last edited by TrophyHunter on Mon Jan 02, 2017 10:33 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 9:42 am 
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Member Servant
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Joined: Fri Sep 10, 2010 10:22 am
Posts: 9354
Location: Mackinaw City, MI, USA
The fact that you are able to take care of your dad and still ride is pretty amazing considering the list of issues you've shared with us. My parents are both gone. My dad leaving in a blink of the eye heart attack at a fairly young age. My mom lived a lot longer and unfortunately suffered from severe dementia in her last years. For me the mental strain and emotions with the rest of the family was the hardest part to deal with. Having an outlet like jumping on one of my bikes and going for a ride to clear my brain fog helped immensely.

I hope you and your dad get many more years to enjoy each others presence. :good:

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 4:54 pm 
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SuperMoto Dude
SuperMoto Dude

Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 10:10 am
Posts: 399
Location: Port Clinton, OH
Thanks guys -

It's helpful to know others have to deal with the health issues of family and how they've dealt with them.

MXRob - my mother passed away last August. In six months she went from an active, normal person to suffering Lewy body dementia and finally passing away in her sleep. It was a gallow's humor for the rest of the family. One day Mom would be in India, the next in Australia fighting in a war, then there was a day that she had an appointment with the Governor of Hawaii regarding her place in Hawaiian history. Even though we laughed about her stories, it was still hard to see her decline so rapidly.

But - yep - there's nothing like a bike to help you forget for awhile.


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 6:51 pm 
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Single Tracker
Single Tracker

Joined: Tue Feb 04, 2014 9:32 pm
Posts: 155
Location: Biloxi, Mississippi
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You guys are great men for taking care of your parents! My dad passed away in '95 from cancer at the age of 64... He was retired from the Air Force and a Korean war veteran. I watched him suffer at home immensely, waking up in the middle of the night hearing him crying from the pain. This went on for about 3 months. He took Aleeve for pain medication as he was not one to go to the hospital. He finally checked himself in and was dead in 2 weeks. My mother and him were married for 42 years. Mom remarried and my step dad had 2 strokes at the age of 78. Eventually we had to place him and my mom into an assisted living facility because they were getting lost on the road. Fast forward to today, mom has dementia and my stepdad is right behind her. He fell again last week and fractured his hip in the same place as last year. Going to rehab again but I do not think he will make it out this time. he is now 87 and mom is 82. And they say retirement is the "Golden years"... I beg to differ. Mom still remembers her 6 children, me being the youngest, but not much else past 5 minutes. It is tough to see this to say the least. :sad:


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 02, 2017 8:15 pm 
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SuperMoto Dude
SuperMoto Dude

Joined: Tue Apr 19, 2016 10:10 am
Posts: 399
Location: Port Clinton, OH
I think a lot of us have concerns, if not stories to share, about our parents or other family members. Many of us are of the age that we deal with our sons and daughters who've returned from Iraq and Afghanistan, some with physical injuries and some with mental injuries. And then, we have our own health to deal with.

It's hard to face and deal with this. Laughing about my Mother's delusional adventures was a coping mechanism against what we saw her go through. With my Dad it's more the physical decline of age and wondering if the next time I call EMS will be the last time also.

Again, thanks to all who have shared.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 04, 2017 12:13 pm 
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Adventure Rider
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Joined: Tue Dec 15, 2015 9:03 am
Posts: 911
Location: Central PA
It's not easy.

I had one set of grandparents who lived into their nineties with no major issues and then suffered heart failure and went quick. Up until then they were fully with it and mobile. The other set passed in their seventies both having suffered strokes and severe dementia and had to be put in assisted care for a few years. It was rough on everyone.

Now my parents are 76. Dad has had a small stroke, but with little to no effect, he was lucky. It happened at my house and I'm a few hundred yards from Penn State Hershey Medical Center. We drove right over and he got treatment in minutes. The usual heart problems, etc. Had his back redone and knee replaced this year. Fortunately that all went well and he's able to be self propelled and all there mentally.

My mom has not had any major health issues but is losing her hearing and getting a bit forgetful if you know what I mean.

It's tough to watch but what can you do other than make sure everything is taken care of and they have as few worries as possible? My younger brother and nephew live with mom and dad so I think that's helpful and keeps them energized having the little guy around. I make sure there are no worries for them about the house or if the fridge craps out, etc. The last thing I want is my parents stressing about how they are going to afford a new dishwasher, or car repair or something.

At some point we're going to have to look at assisted care or a visiting nurse. Nothing immediate I don't think, and I feel fortunate that at their age nothing life altering has come up, but at some point, it will happen. You just kind of have to do what needs done when the time comes and hang in there.

You also gotta be tough for them. Once I had to take my dad to the emergency room and they wound up doing some stents. He was scared about it of course and I had to give him the tough guy, quit being a pussy, I'll see you in a couple hours when they are done, pep talk. I was scared about it to, but as the oldest son, you gotta buck up and at least pretend for everyone else that it's no big deal.

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